Reply to Why DON'T you set boundaries?

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Reply to "Why DON'T you set boundaries?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sadly everyone posting here about it not being simple to set boundaries all have the same issue:

They can not accept their parents/family do not love them the way they want them too or think they should.

[b]Setting the boundary means that the parent/family may not make the effort to cross it [/b]and for many that is more crushing then being guilted into something/blamed/ridiculed

[/quote]

This makes no sense. The point of setting boundaries is that you DON'T want the parent/family to cross it. I don't think anyone here has said that they are secretly worried that once a boundary is set, they will learn that the parent/family doesn't really care. In fact, it's the opposite - people have been saying that boundaries bring out even more emotion, and THAT'S what people are trying to avoid.

In my own case, my in-laws just aren't used to boundaries, and see them as a personal insult, but they are intrusive and annoying because they love their son and his family, so it's a delicate process of "training" them and avoiding hurting their feelings unnecessarily.[/quote]

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