Reply to Could use some advice re not getting drawn in, family secrets and drama etc...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op,
If she is going through a divorce I'm sure she is trying to get "her side" out, and is trying to get your support, as her sister.
It's typical in divorced for both sides to feel wronged and want to blame the other, almost like dividing up a PE class into teams, except it's friends and family.

I have a couple suggestions:
1. Give yourself an out so you don't get stuck at lunch forever "Susan, I have to leave by 130 pm for that appt. looking forward to spending an hour with you" kind of thing.

2. Tell her up front that you will NOT keep secrets from your family or her children, anything that she wants to entrust you with had better not involve putting you in an awkward situation with your family (you can phrase it better!) Remind her she has a team of professional support for that kind of thing.

3. Prepare a way to leave if it gets bad. "I'm sorry, I love you and always will, but I can't listen to this right now."
If you rehearse it, it's easier to say and do.[/quote]

This is compassionate and thoughtful.  Thank you.  [/quote]

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