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[quote=Anonymous]OP, ignore the nasty posters.  My older DD is very intense.  Tested every boundary, was a high needs baby, very stubborn, the works. Needed to have everything just so.  If you disturbed her routine she would fly off the rails.  When she became more verbal and able to express more complex thoughts and feelings, somewhere after age 3, she started calming down a bit.

She's still intense but it's not necessarily a bad thing.  In fact now that there are fewer battles over getting dressed, eating, getting out the door, getting in the door-- I actually like and appreciate her intensity.  She concentrates very hard on the task at hand.  She throws her whole self into what she does. It's like she feels everything more intensely.  She's fun to be around.  She keeps me on my toes.

It helped me to read a book called Raising Your Spirited Child.  I highly recommend it.

FWIW, my second DC is not intense at all.  DC2 is as mellow as DD1 is intense.  Follows rules, doesn't test boundaries.  Just an easy kid so far.  These kids are born with certain temperaments.

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