Reply to Domestic violence - is it inevitable in every relationship?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. No, I don't think it's normal, I think it's scary that he has this history and I'm trying to figure out if this relationship is doomed. But again if this is how abusers start off, it is easy to see how one might think everything is fine.  My therapist does not think it's inevitable. But she advised me to keepy eyes open and observe the way he behaves over time. [/quote]

I think that's pretty bad advice from your therapist and here's why: you'll get entrenched in the relationship, he'll wait until he knows he "has you" before letting his true colors fly, and you'll find every excuse not to leave (some may be very valid - he may, over time, make it very difficult for you to leave. That's what they do.) Look, there's no real way to know, but why in the hell would you gamble on something like this? People who are convicted of domestic violence offenses, in my opinion, don't deserve the benefit of the doubt. OP, you sound like a nice person, and in your own words in need of attention (another red flag - he knows this). Don't do this. There are plenty of men out there who don't have domestic violence in their history.[/quote]

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