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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][[b]quote=Anonymous]I have to agree with 14:27. Think about the fact that there is some unsuspecting teenage girl out there who is just hoping to get a nice roommate and have a good college experience. Knowing what you know about living with your DD, it sounds incredibly unfair to both girls to put them in a position where they will probably end up hating each other. Sure, many 18-year-olds are hard to live with, but what you have described sounds extreme. She does not sound capable of being a good roommate even if she wants to. At the very least, petition the school for a single.  If you stick with a double I feel awful for the poor girl who has this coming for her freshman year, and also for your DD.  The roommate situation can truly be the make or break for a positive experience at college, and a bad roommate situation is HELL for everyone. [/quote][/b]

Parent of high functioning Aspie/ADHD/GAD who is in college.  Honors kids in high school.  We were completely blown away with how difficult the transition was for DS to enter college because he had done so well in high school and on travels abroad.  IMHO, if your child is on the spectrum, they will always be autistic.  It is much more apparent now that DS is high functioning Aspie (autistic) than when a child.  When applied disclosing all, worked with the office of disability services, got a single room with a shared bathroom with a R.A. (who turned out to be more of a wreck than our child).  DS just spiraled down and slept all the time (very common in these situations).  We had to get ODS involved.  WE scheduled times for organizational meetings.  ODS met with faculty and explained issues and need for extra time.  Tutored up.  Made use of the writing center at the University.  We even had to call and wake DS up.  Fortunately DS's university is close-by so we could "rescue" from time to time.  Everything OP describes is my ASD kid.  I think your tester was wrong and that you really need to quickly talk to ODS at your university and have meetings now.  ODS most likely will require fresh testing if not done within the last three years.  You take that testing in to ODS along with prior testing and any  IEPs (they don't apply but show a record) and ODS works with you to get a reduced workload (very important) and whatever accommodations your child needs.  You must have your child sign away their privacy rights on the FERPA form or no one at the university will be able to talk to you and you will experience what my sister and other friends have experiences - the letter from the university saying your kids has not been attending classes, is failing, and is not invited to return next term.  If your arrogant child will not do that, then you are not going to pay for this very expensive adventure and they can go to community college.  You will find your child will have great difficulty self-regulating, taking care of sleep issues, eating right, washing themselves and exercising.  You will probably also find out that they cannot write a comprehensive academic paper without tutoring.  I wish you the best of luck, but please call ODS at your university now (August is good time to work this out) and explain the situation.  They can tell you if you need new testing and will usually provide a list of local testers they like.  You need to get on this right away.  Our first two years of college were hell and took much out of DW and me and attention away from other SN kids - we didn't see it coming.[/quote]

OP here. Thank you for this very detailed post, PP. This is exactly what I fear will happen.

I have not gotten back to this thread because I've been trying to pack for DD, who is fighting me every step of the way!! I find myself crying every day, both from fear of letting her go to college, and anger at how difficult she is to deal with.

For those who suggested a gap year, I know that would have been right for DD, but she refused to consider it. We pushed her, but she did nothing about it, and eventually told us she wanted to go to college. She really needs structure, and could not structure a gap year for herself.

We've decided to send her to college, and let her fall on her ass if it comes to that. I'm doing everything I can to prevent that, but I don't think keeping her at home will help anything. She's super-smart, got very high grades, test scores, stellar recommendations, etc. in high school, where she functioned pretty well. She's also a varsity athlete.

I've contacted the disability office at her school, and they have agreed to give her the accommodations she got in high school, even without her diagnosis (which wasn't an ASD diagnosis, BTW. Hard to explain, but she really has no diagnosis at the moment.) I've spoken with her about psychological services at her school, which are free and available to all students. I don't think she'll reach out to them, though. She did sign the FERPA, so we can get info about her from the school. I dread those phone calls.

She went to private school so had no IEP. I'm not sure what kind of testing to do at the moment. The college's disabilty office said we should wait and see how she does, and if she gets into difficulty, they will recommend testing. That doesn't sound very proactive to me, but I feel like my hands are tied at this point.

I did speak with several school psychologists, but they would administer IQ tests and a battery of (something) Johnson (?) tests as well as a reading test. I can't see that paying $1,500 for those tests will reveal anything useful about DD, except that she's smart, which we already know.

Parents, can you suggest other types of testing? Other suggestions?

Anyone else, please tell me your story. Thanks.

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