Reply to 13 year old son - is this normal?

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[quote=Anonymous]Sounds like my son was at that age. Social at school, with some friends who would hang out here and there, but never really the instigator and not really the social butterfly type.

For some reason society expects kids to be constantly hanging out, an 8th grade counselor even pulled me and DH aside and said she didnt see him hanging out much after school and was worried he was depressed. He wasn't. He just never really felt the need to be constantly surrounded by friends, he would rather have some alone time and 2-3 really close friends to hang out with a couple times a week then roll with a posse like most kids tended to do.

He is now 21, successful at school, working, and still isnt a social butterfly. But, the friends he has (more then in the past, admittedly... I think drinking definitely made him appreciate the whole posse thing) are close friends, and surprisingly he has become the person they go to with problems.

I wouldn't worry unless he brings it up. What people want in terms of a social life differs a lot. I hate big, formal occasions, I see them as a lot of work for me and dislike how I have to fit into other people's expectations. My DH on the other hand loves them, thinks they are highly enjoyable and that the work is well worth it. So just listen to your son. Maybe he is being left out purposefully. Or maybe he just isn't interested in it.

Oh yeah, and comparatively DS was much easier to handle then DD who is a social butterfly.  [/quote]

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