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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here: thank you so very much for the advice given - very sound. I am really grateful. I have nothing to discuss with my [b]DH - he has total blinders on when it comes to his parents - they are perfect, have always been perfect, and will always be perfect. Any kid thing - like a kid being fussy - will always be my "fault" and any desire to adhere to their own timelines is perceived as "rigidity" [/b]- this came into play in our last visit, in dramatic fashion.

If anyone remembers, someone above did, I am the mall poster - my in laws love the mall, love, love, love the mall and love to take us to the mall. They expect kids to eat on their schedule and literally eye roll when i point out that there is a time difference and they need to have lunch at time X, which is "too early" for them.

For grandparents that claim to so dearly love their grandkids, they are interestingly uninterested in accommodating them.

Anyways, since I can't not go - or go for less time (tried suggesting that one - but since in laws don't lift a finger to help after stating "we help SOOOO much," or discuss this in an open, adult way with DH, I am just trying to build an itinerary (have already found mini golf and a cool pool a few towns over) and will find a movie to see with the kids (great idea!!!) and will take time for myself to exercise every day. I'm also loading up my kindle and will go to bed early to leave DH with his parents. I hope, hope, hope we can have a dinner out, but with his parents who knows?

just a little note - my mil was in town for our first valentine's day with our new daughter - MIL insisted on being taken out to Vday dinner, and not watching DD so DH and I could have the night out - that is typical for them.

Thank you all for helping me take the high road. I intend to post on here to vent (and prepared a friend for on-going venting to be coming!)[/quote]

That is terrible, OP! My in-laws are pretty bad. I posted earlier. But at the very least DH agrees they are awful and doesn't want to see them either. I couldn't imagine how much more tough it would be with a DH who thinks his parents who act as you have described are perfect. Good luck and definitely come back to vent! [/quote]

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