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[quote=Anonymous]Yes, it's entirely normal for divorced parents to spend time together.  My ex (whom I never married) and I have been doing this for over 10 years -- dinner together several nights a week, occasional weekend activities together, and definitely jointly attending school and sports events.  The kids are not confused.  They know we will never get back together.  We made that clear when we separated.  They appreciate not having to divide their time and seeing each of us more than 50% of the time.

When my ex gets re-married, I expect he will spend less time with all of us together, but I hope it doesn't end altogether, not because *I* want to spend time with him, but because they kids like to have both their parents at events and to be able to talk to both of us at the same time.  We are able to get along and don't fight, so it's not really a problem.  If the new girlfriend is a reasonable person, I would hope that all three of us could spend time together now and then and be courteous to each other.

For many people, modern divorce is quite different from the hostile 50/50, no contact of yesteryear.

Similarly, if I remarry, I would expect my new spouse or boyfriend to meet and get along with my ex and be open to having him visit and participate in holidays, events, etc.  Anything else would be an absolute non-starter for me.

A significant other who is jealous of my ex, or who views time spent with my ex as some kind of judgment on my commitment to my new significant other, would clearly be someone who is not ready for a serious relationship with a partner who has prior family commitments.  Previously existing family doesn't just end or fit into a neat box.

What's really a red flag is your relationship with your boyfriend, not his relationship with his ex. 
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