Reply to Long-term implications of egg or sperm donated by a sibling

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Would this be something you would ever tell your children (or they would ever accidentally find out)? You don't know who they will be yet, so you can't anticipate how they would react to the news. Consider this carefully.[/quote]

This full disclosure is something that the Drs and fertility counselors will push for, OP.

DH, BIL, and I agreed to never tell anyone and have no reason to change our minds. DD just happens to look a lot like a certain uncle who happens to look a lot like his father, DD's grandfather. So she looks a lot like her grandfather's side of the family (whereas DH tends to favor his mother more even though the brothers resemble each other a lot).

The whole IVF process and then the donor necessity was such an gift and a persistently intrusive burden all at the same time. We are so grateful to be parents, and for us believe that we deserve whatever tiny bit of privacy we were able to have. Especially because we stayed in the immediate gene pool - it's not like she would have surprises come up like accidentally dating her bio brother or something like that.

Everyone in our family and circle of friends would have been cool with us having used a donor and IVF so our decision not to disclose has nothing to do with that. We just think there is room for more than one valid approach to this very big issue.[/quote]

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