Reply to Losing patience with a difficult ex; disengage or keep trying?

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[quote=Anonymous]

OP - I did not see if you have done so, but since you indicated this ex BF has mental health issues and/or could be a bit unstable, I would legally get full custody if you have not already done so and also note that no child support was requested or offered.  In that way you have full legal protection of your DC.  Additionally, you may want to get legal advice on formalizing visits with ex parents or just keeping it informal so that you remain in control of what happens, especially if they have not made any overtures for continued involvement in your son's life.  This fellow as you describe does not seem to be one who could add any real positive aspect to DC's life or to your own.  As noted, your son is young enough to stop the contact, unless your EX really indicated a strong and consistent desire to have one.

It might be very beneficial to you to see a counselor a few times to get feedback on your feelings about what you have tried to do to establish a father/son bond, support that it is time to let that go in the past and help to build confidence in your plan and desire to move forward for a life of your own, too.  You have rightly focused on being Mom for the last three years, but it is time for the well being of both you and DC to make time to cultivate your own friendships, both male and female, away from DC.  If a relationship follows that can only be a wonderful new dimension to your life.  You are fortunate that you are in a financial position to raise your son.  Put some money into finding a reliable sitter so you can spread your wings a bit.[/quote]

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