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[quote=Anonymous]This has happened to me, but the friends lived in a different city and had each other.  Both friends from growing up, one from school, the other from outside of school.  They both moved to NY after college and became very good friends.  Fast forward several years and they are no longer living in the same city.  We've all remained friends and see each other together or separately, depending on who is in town and for what event.  They also see each other without me.

I was probably jealous initially of the time they got to spend together, but as things have played out, I am still better friends with each of them then they are to each other.  My friendship with each is longer and goes back through years that mattered. There was really nothing to be "jealous" of.  I just wanted to be a part of the fun things they did, but not living near them, that was kind of silly.

I used to be a lot more sensitive about this stuff.  One of the best things I learned is that usually, whatever is bothering me, it's more about the other person than it is about me.  I think, are they intentionally doing something to hurt my feelings?  Rarely is that the case.  I'm able to brush stuff off a lot more now, and I'm busier...so I don't have the time to worry about it as much as I did when single, didn't have kids, etc.  When I was lonelier (which was the case on and off), I was more sensitive and took things personally.  Not taking everything personally has been quite liberating.  It's a process, but I am not nearly as sensitive as I once felt.

I agree there is no good way to bring this up, and really, what would your desired outcome be? I think you can say, "hey, next time you two go out, give me a call -- I love spending time with you."  Or whatever you would normally say.  Otherwise, you will come off as dictating their friendship.  I think that will make everyone uncomfortable.[/quote]

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