Reply to Someone lied about a position DS had - she got in, DS didn't. Appropriate to tell school?

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Reply to "Someone lied about a position DS had - she got in, DS didn't. Appropriate to tell school?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am a Catholic, but I still believe in a rule of karma.  If this girl is a liar, then her day will eventually come.

However, if your son upsets the balance in her life,  then one day someone will equally upset his.

If you really feel that you must intervene, then here is a more mature (and less karma upsetting) solution.

Have your son approach his classmate and politely say, "I read your resume on the website, and you appear to have mistakenly and in error listed X position as one you hold when, in fact, you and I both know that I hold X position.  I would appreciate it if you would change your mistake."

He might follow up, as guidance, "employers sometimes let people go who include such mistakes on their resumes."  She will get the message loud and clear, but your son won't be responsible for having her admissions rescinded (which he might feel guilty about in the long run).[/quote]

I suggested this approach.

Yes, I do think that a high school senior, going off to an elite (or really any) university next year, should be mature enough to approach another individual person-to-person to discuss an issue that they might have with them.  Believe me, if he takes her aside and to task, she will be mortified by having her transgression caught, and she won't be telling anyone else in the class about it.  (By the time he was in eighth grade, I had already told my son that if he had an issue with scheduling, grades, conflicts, commitments, then it was his responsibility to contact the other individual directly (or by email) to sort it out -- not mine.)

My problem with going to the college anonymously is two-fold.  First, it teaches your son that handling problems through anonymous emails, or messages, is a good approach, which it generally is not.  Second, it reflects badly on future applicants from your school.  First, because the school's applicants seemingly exaggerate their credentials and qualifications.  And second, because the school's students (and they will know this came from a classmate) are the type to undercut each other anonymously.  The university will, like me, ask themselves why your school's students do not possess the maturity to handle this personally amongst themselves.

Finally, whenever I am thinking of doing something which causes me to question my own judgment, I turn to one if my sisters to ask WWYD?  If you and your son really think that it is a good idea to anonymously contact a university to report another student's transgression, then why not have your son ask a trusted advisor or counselor at his school WWYD?  If he cannot even bring himself to do so (discuss the plan with a counselor), then he probably should not bring himself to do so (anonymously report it to the college).[/quote]

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