Reply to What about this as a breach of trust?

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[quote=Anonymous]Let me get this straight:  he lights up more than moderately but YOU'RE on the bad guy for telling?  That's messed up.

Your husband was relying on not having his bad behavior exposed and then turns it around that exposing his bad behavior is the problem?

If his behavior is so justifiable why does it need to be covered up?  Smoking pot is generally ignored in most states, like having a beer.

This suggests to me it is a bigger problem.  Additionally I am worried by the financial contribution imbalance in your household and your break down.  Why is exposing his pot smoking more of a big deal than your hospitalization and now you're on medication?????

Let me summarize:

-you shouldn't be responsible for hiding his behavior and he doesn't get to call you out for failing to hide it.  If it's not something he wants exposed, he shouldn't be doing it
-he should be contributing financially.  It worries me that he can smoke pot all day but not hold a job.  Are they related issues?
-your break down should be his priority, not his hurt feelings of being exposed.  Why isn't he taking care of you?  Why isn't it a priority to take care of you?
-I'm also worried that you are medicating because love makes us vulnerable to accept things we shouldn't.  Is this you?

I'm very worried about these dynamics.  It doesn't sound like a mutual healthy partnership. It doesn't sound like it's good for you.  I'm not sure counseling could or would agree to fix you being happy in such an unbalanced situation.  Really?  Couples counseling to try to stay happy with this unsatisfactory state of affairs?  B.S.
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