Reply to What about this as a breach of trust?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What do you think.  Breach of trust? Or perhaps more importantly, is it time to go?  I would like to give it one last shot in couples therapy, but my spouse said this issue is not open for discussion with the therapist. Period.

Sorry in advance for typos and length. I just feel numb by this exchange. Just happened tonight. Any and all thoughts welcomed.[/quote]

Whoa, lady...where to start...

First, no, it's not a breach of trust, or rather: it is a violation but ordinarily wouldn't matter since therapy sessions are generally completely confidential (I don't believe marijuana use is a mandatory reporter situation), and ordinarily your individual therapist would not have a meeting with your husband "in preparation for couples therapy".  Your therapist might meet with him, with your permission, to discuss your therapy and your condition.  I think your therapist is way out on the ethical edge here - so if there's a breach, it's there.  Yes, many many many people find a spouse, sibling, child, parent going to therapy deeply threatening because they know the client is "talking about them".  The issue here is your therapist talking to him about it and inserting themselves into this.  Really sketchy.  Of course, some therapists take sides.

You sound like you have major issues; it's possible your husband is toking up like a fiend because he's self-medicating.  Every hardcore pot smoker ("addict") I've ever seen is self-medicating (just like you taking lexapro) - it's entirely possible that trying to live with you is driving him to this - remove you from his life, maybe he comes back down.  The inverse is also possible.  Both things are possible (likely).

I'd say, regardless of the blame game, that the two of you are in an awful, toxic dance.  I'd say it's time to split up.  I also say Pot is way preferable to Lexapro.  [/quote]

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