Reply to MIL gives us crap, gives SIL heirlooms

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, given your follow up post, I  think you should let this go and say good riddance.
Originally, I was going to say that I know sometimes mothers feel like daughters are more likely to keep it in the family.  My mom had bad experiences with daughter in laws who divorced and took family heirloom with them (and I know other families that had the same problem, including someone who can't get back her grandmother's jewelry from her ex-stepmom).  
If there are specific things that your husband or kids would want, they should say something to MIL -- like "I always loved grandpa's watch collection.  I would really love to have one as a memory of grandpa."  If your kids have a good relationship, they can ask directly.  But once you say that the relationship is/was abusive, I say let it all go.  It won't bring happy memories anyway.[/quote]

Thanks for your kind post!  There is part of me that wants DH to let it go, but he really wants a medal or two or significance from his father.  He knows his father would be extremely proud of him, and would want him to have it.  All MIL has ever given him is crap, literally and figuratively.  I think he is afraid if he comes out and asks for the item (of no monetary significance, BTW), she would delight in saying that she has given it to (BIL); citing some arbitrary, illogical reason of hers. I can see DH's point, that logically, one or two should go to DH.  (The other brothers are not married, and have no kids, nor will they be, if this matters).  MIL is very passive aggressive and biting, and delights in being mean and nasty, quite simply (hence my distance). [/quote]

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