Reply to getting past my mother's death

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I lost my mother--my best friend, really--a few years ago, and while the initial shock and pain are behind me, I still experience a lingering sadness. My thoughts often go back to the years just before she got sick, when my kids were still small (or being born) and all the great times we had together. We were always close, but my becoming a mother (and her becoming a grandmother) brought us even closer. I miss her so much; I miss talking to her, being with her, seeing her with my children.

These "after shocks" related to my mother's death seem also to be overlapping with general midlife crisis stuff. My kids are growing up and no longer need me as much, my work is so-so, my body is aging, and all told my life isn't exactly turning out the way I thought it would. I've tried talk therapy, which helped a bit but only up to a point. I also try to be grateful every single day for all that I do have, and volunteer often in my community where I can. Still, I can't seem to shake this notion that all the good stuff in life has already happened (going off to college, living on my own and growing into my own person, falling in love, starting a family, etc.).

Has anyone else experienced being stuck like this after the death a parent? Are there any authors or other resources anyone can point to to help me move on and get unstuck?[/quote]

I lost my mom 15 years ago and I would say at this point for you, years out, each passing year it should be easier to remember her without being overwhelmed by sadness. There will always be some episodes of grief you will feel over the years.  I agree with PP it sounds like depression more than anything. [/quote]

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