Reply to Vent. I'm a slave.

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[quote=Anonymous]OP here. I DO MY JOB, thanks so much. Does that mean that DH should come home and be waited on hand and foot because his wife is a SAHM? When he is home he should do absolutely nothing except play?

[quote]I agree with this post but only to a point. My DH does something similar, and it bugs me. DH clears up after dinner because I cooked. Great. But, cleaning up doesn't just mean putting the dishes away. It does mean cleaning up the pots/pans and wiping the crumbs off the table/counter. If the person who is supposed to be cleaning is not doing this, then who is? Should we just leave the pots/pans dirty on the stove and crumbs on the table? I don't tell my DH "how" to clean, but if he is going to do it, then do it completely, not half the job. That's what OP is stating. That her H is doing a half-ass job, not that he's not doing it "her" way.

OP - I just politely ask my DH if he could wipe down the table, too. But inside, it does bug me that I have to tell him to do that. I'm hoping that eventually he will just get used to doing it. This is not an area that I want to fight over. [/quote]

OP here-
This is an issue. For one, we have been married over 15 years.  I really am past caring [i]how [/i] he does a job. But do the whole job! I don't care if you seriously lick the table to get it clean. But it does need to be clean after dinner, kids want to do homework on the table and play games and it's just gross to have a dirty table the next day. By the time I go to the table and realize everything is still out and messy, DH is on to other things, like in his office doing emails or playing a game with one of the kids. Then it feels so petty (and like I'm his mom or something) to say "DH, can you please come back up and finish wiping the table and put away the placemats?". Because that's something I would say to my kids, kwim? And I'm not putting a clean towel out there because I was told to do it, I do it because if I'm the 2nd person to shower for the day and I go to reach for a towel and it's the wet one DH used that morning and my dry one is across from the shower, yes, I get annoyed. So I feel like it's a nice thing to do for another human being.  I truly don't feel like a doormat but I feel like when I complain about these things individually they seem petty. But over time they build up and turn into something big.  [/quote]

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