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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If it were my kid, I'd ask the teachers to be diligent with time outs immediately upon any aggression and I'd give them catch blanche to remove any privileges they think are appropriate - like sitting out of circle time. I'd also want to know sooner rather than later, so I'd ask that I get a call if there's more than one incident in a given day.

If it's just typical three year old behavior, then your kid will give it up the pushing behavior quickly as long as discipline is consistent and he's getting what he needs in terms of sleep, food, and attention/affection. If it doesn't improve despite those things, then I'd revisit the issue and consider something more serious may be going on. Probably not, based on what you shared, so just take the next two weeks to work on turning this around. [/quote]

Thank you, very good advice.

To the group -- I find the only way I can enforce a time out at home is to put him in his room and stand there holding the bedroom door closed for a bit. If I put him against a wall or corner or on a small area rug, he just leaves that spot. I can stand there and try to block him from leaving, but end up holding him still there, which seems to be ineffective and apparently may be contributing to this issue he's having at school.

Do you think time out in his room is okay (there are things to play with in there, and he never seems to take the time out seriously - smiling and laughing that he's out instead of being more aware that he's done something wrong to earn a time out), or is there a better way to force time outs elsewhere in the house that I don't know?[/quote]

NP here. I wouldn't say we have quite the same issues with our DD but she definitely has a dominant personality and can be aggressive with her friends so I'm watching it. On the timeout front, things do sound quite similar. Our usual timeout spot is on the stairs. She usually will not stay on them and immediately gets up when we put her there. Instead of replacing her 30+ times supernanny style, which increases our level of frustration and can lead us to be too physical with her, we simply ignore her as soon as she gets up and tell her, over and over, nothing else happens until you go do your timeout. I will also follow her around and remove any toys or books tht she picks up (though usually it's her that follows us around, begging for attention). Anything she says gets answered in the same way: you need to go do your timeout, then I will talk to you. It might not work for every kid, but it does for ours because what she really wants is attention. Eventually she goes back voluntarily and sits on the step.

For more egregious violations, mostly hitting, I pick her up and carry her to her room. Stomping up the stairs holding 30 lbs of toddler helps get my frustration out, and she knows it's a bigger deal. I sit her down in her room, close the door, and leave. She typically will immediately follow me back downstairs, at which point we commence ignoring until she's done her timeout. Sometimes she'll stay upstairs and play with the toys in her room, but often her desire for attention overrides that too.

Anyway, just some suggestions for avoiding a power struggle over timeouts. It doesn't work perfectly for us but it's the best we've hit on so far. DD will be three in a couple months. [/quote]

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