Reply to I left my toxic marriage- YOU CAN TOO!

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, your daughter is a tool to him and when she's alone with him she is at the mercy of his disorder. He can't see her as a person that must be cared for. He sees her as something that exists in relation to the mess of his twisted-up feelings and self-image and needs. She is a child and has little defense against this. Heck, it's hard for an adult to deal with BPD people, which is why you saved your neck. I know you're desperate to protect your child, and I fear you may be throwing her to the wolves by leaving her alone with him. Sadly, courts don't protect children from emotional abuse the way they do from physical abuse.

I think you should do all you can to limit her time with him, and do not put her through family therapy where he can know anything she says or feels about him. You're going to spend a lot of time and money trying to keep up with undoing the toxins he feeds her with every visit.

When my husband was a child, his BPD father used to have visitation with him, and would manipulate and guilt and shame the boy. The boy grew up feeling everything was his fault, full of shame, full of self-hate, and with a  load of BPD traits.

Because children internalize the voices of their parents.

I wish you luck and strength, OP. It's going to be a long battle.[/quote]

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