Reply to Getting in-laws to spend time with grandchild or leave it?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't push relationships. If my father (who is angry at me for not being friends with his ex-wife (who is not my mother)) wants to spend time with my daughters then he can reach out. The kids will be fine not having a relationship with him. They have people of all generations in their lives.

Sometimes family is the family you're born into and sometimes it's the family you create among friends. [/quote]
I know, it's just so hard. I left my friends and family and have really struggled here. I just want my son to have a living family. I had a flaky grandma and it really hurt me. [/quote]

If you were hurt by a flaky granny, then it's because your parents were giving you too much info. Instead of "Susie, Granny's coming today! Oops, I guess she forgot/was busy..." they should have been all "Oh my gosh Susie, look! Granny's here!"  Then you'd just have been happy to see her when she showed up. [/quote]

Oh, please! You can't blame her parents. Kids figure it out and ask questions. I'm not estranged from my brother but he has no interest in having a relationship with my family. We last saw him and his family about 6 years ago. His wife sent lovely holiday gifts, though. My ds (who could care less about the gifts) could only ask why his uncle doesn't want a relationship with him.[/quote]

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