Reply to He gets upset/sulky about me stating my feelings

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm newly involved with a man the [b]last few months[/b].  Whenever I have gently stated my feelings about something in our relationship, and my need in regard to that, he freaks out.  I mean, he gets so upset and says sorry over and over, but then shuts down and "can't talk" and has to go (like if we're on the phone) or even when together.  Then it's like there is a sulking thing going for a day or two.  I try to talk about it and explain it, [b]reassure I still love him[/b] all the same, just asking for something I need (something[b] small and reasonable[/b]).  It doesn't seem to help.

It seems he is so affected by anything he perceives as criticism from his SO, that it really upsets him.  But then I also feel like the doesn't like it, so he uses the "I'm so injured" routine and gets so upset and sulky, making it a huge deal, to [b]deter[/b] me from saying those types of things in the future.  More like it's a manipulation, a way to control something he doesn't like from happening again.  I suppose it still really bothers him in that case, but he is trying to manipulate the situation with his [b]tantrums/sulking[/b].  Thoughts anyone?  Tell me about these people.  This is new to me.[/quote]

what exactly do you need and what do you consider small and reasonable? material things? Who needs the reassurance, you or him? Why only after a few months are you having to reassure someone you love them? Grown man has tantrums and sulks? You both sound a little off your rockers OP.[/quote]

OP here.  We've been together 6 months, and we both feel a deep love for each other.  We haven't talked about the future yet, it's too early.  We are middle-aged.  I'm am not a material person, so no, no material requests.  Other than the things I described in my examples post, there has only been one other time with something similar, and he had a similar reaction.  So in 6 months there have been 3 times.  I don't feel that is a lot of sharing my feelings and wanting to talk a little bit about them.  I'm open to criticism though, so if you think otherwise, please, in all sincerity, share those thoughts.[/quote]

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