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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm with DH on this one. You had a plan in place and then you, unilaterally, changed it without asking him. It doesn't matter that you see them all the time, etc.

The major error here was in not talking to DH about it first before you told your family it was OK. If you had, you two could have come up with a solution he was on board with and could have better sold it to his family.[/quote]

This.  You made a mistake of promising something that affected many people without consulting any of them.  There were regularly holiday plans, that some of your in laws family may have been planning around for some time and then you unilaterally decided to change things without even consulting your husband?  Even when my parents want to make a change, I say "I understand.  Let me talk to <spouse> and we'll see if we can figure something out and I'll get back to you."

Marriage is a partnership.  You elevated yourself above partner and expect him to just accept what you did even though it affects his family too.

In our family, my brother wants to stay home for Christmas so that my nieces are in the same town with both families (both of them have remarried and live closeby).  So, my family is coming up for the week after Christmas through New Year's to celebrate.  For us, the key is not the day in particular, but the event of spending a holiday together as a family.  We'll have our big "Christmas dinner" on Saturday the 27th.[/quote]

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