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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a pull in fast type person in terms of being completely open and honest. I would totally talk to someone on the second date about a job offer. But that's just me. To me these are not red flags. The only one I didn't like was when you mentioned he puts other people down, that's not nice [/quote]

I'm not a fast commitment person but I've seen it work for other people.  The put downs about overweight people and the ex's is a big red flag.  His struggles with weight shouldn't translate into picking on someone else.  Also, if everyone you dated was "crazy" at some point you need to point the finger at yourself and own your part in the dynamic.  If he makes those comments to you, I would challenge him on it.

With the constant texting, let him know your limit i.e "one in the morning, lunchtime, leaving for the day at most and I may get busy and will respond in the evening. If that doesn't work, then you need a different girl that can respond 24-7 texting" and stick to it. No one can be controlling unless you allow yourself to be controlled.  When I started dating my now DH might take a day to respond to email (this was before texting) and I explained to him my concern about it being the infamous fade out if I felt like It was calling him most of the time or he didn't respond to email.  He reassured me of his feelings and I accepted it taking awhile to respond to email but I put the ball in his court and was upfront about him taking the lead with calling.

The lack of compromise is the other big red flag.  I would point this out to him if he did this to me.  Now what will be telling is when you stand up to him on the constant texting, the put down with the ex's and overweight people, and when he isn't compromising how does he handle it?  If he seems to get better, I still wouldn't consider marriage, if you are on that track, without serious pre-marital counseling.[/quote]

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