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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have always realized that I will need more than one mother in my life. My biological mother does not fulfill all (or even many) of my emotional needs, so I have connected with aunts and other older women who have been mentors to me.

I tell my young adult daughters the same thing. I give them permission to always find other "mothers" and other mentors, because I cannot fill all their maternal needs, as hard as I try. And that's OK. They will have needs that come along, and I hope they will find the people in their lives to meet their needs, if I can't. I also want them to tell me what I can do to be there for them in a way that is helpful to them. Each of my daughters is different. My role is different in their lives. They are getting better at articulating what they need, and I am getting more intuitive with each passing year.

It takes a village. I don't pretend to be everything my kids need.

I learned the hard way not to look to my mom for all my needs. It just was not going to happen. I have let go of that and have branched out, and I encourage my girls to do the same.

Look around for other mentors, and in return, become a mentor to other young women as you grow older.
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Agreed. The truth is that expectations are unrealistic for mothers. We are not Mother Earth.
I had a suffocating and stunting childhood because of my parents, but I realized as a young adult that it was up to me to climb out of the mess, grow up and seek out help elsewhere.
My parents are what they are, they will not change, and they love me in their own way.

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