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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I didn't read the other responses.

Here are my thoughts:

MIL could be lying (to save face) about not being upset about watching your child 2 days a week.  If she is the kind of person who likes to pretend everything is okay, then of course she's not going to tell you even though it might be a horrible inconvenience for her to babysit your child for 2 days a week.

It's likely she did say something to SIL, and SIL, knowing MIL wasn't going to do anything about it, decided to tell you.

I don't think SIL owes you an apology.  But if you keep making that an issue, then no wonder she ignores you.  She expressed her opinion -- that she thought you were taking advantage of her mother for childcare.  And likely, it's true that MIL didn't want to do it and perhaps was relieved when you switched to daycare.  That's why she just brushes it under the rug -- because she got what she wanted without having to do the confrontation herself.

It actually doesn't really sound like MIL or SIL have done anything particularly bad to you.  You just aren't close.  I don't really see the extreme dysfunction.  You can't pick your family members, so if family members just aren't best buds, the best thing to do is just be cordial.  What bad thing is your child going to learn?

I have some inlaws I don't particularly like.  I'm cordial with them, but I don't pretend to be someone I'm not.  I'd rather our relationship be cold and distant (perhaps what you call "ignoring" each other) than fake and forced.  [/quote]

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