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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP as a MIL I notice that my DIL is likely to take casual comments I make very seriously, and transform them into presumed directions or criticisms.  I'm not saying this is your situation, but you might consider the possibility.  You do say "they're running my life and don't even know it."

Good luck to you in working this out.  It's a hard relationship.[/quote]

I feel for you. I realize how hard it's to be a MIL. I think you should praise and flatter your DIL a lot, to balance out the negativity.
I've been married for 5 years and yet to hear something positive from MIL directed at me. Maybe she believes she makes causal comments, but how come all of them directed at me, not her son? 
[/quote]

Same here.  I have never once heard MIL say anything positive about immediate family, and certainly not me.  It would kill her.  I have however, heard random fabrications and exaggerated praise about distant relatives we will probably never meet.  Its quite odd, but just the beginning of a huge number of oddities.  To say warm and fuzzy is not her thing would be extremely, extremely kind.

I don't need tons of affirmation, least of all from anyone bitter, but geeze the negativity is oppressive.

[/quote]

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