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[quote=Anonymous]Wow. I'm surprised at the hostility of some of you. I was just looking for help. FTR, I did not try to "change" him, but thanks for the judgement... He indicated it was there, he just wasn't quite comfortable letting it out. I didn't force him (although not sure how I could), I didn't withhold sex just b/c it wasn't meeting what I needed, I was patient and encouraged him by creating a safe environment and not pushing him. We had talks yes, but that was all it was, there weren't arguments or criticisms. Additionally, if I'd have forced or pressured him into "changing", he wouldn't have carried on with it and started doing it on his own. He very obviously enjoyed it at the time. And to the one that tried to cite some kind of dishonesty or inconsistency in my post: I said he was comfortable with his *job* after a few months. He's not new to it anymore, and although I left him alone about this when he was still adjusting to the job, it's been a year and a half now. It took a couple of years to get him to where he was *because* I wasn't pushing him. He went at his own pace. It just does not make sense to me. If simply getting my way by pushing him is what I wanted to do, I wouldn't need anyone's permission or opinion. The fact that I came here to try to get some insight or advice is proof that I *don't* want to force it. I just don't understand why it changed. I don't understand why so many of you feel the need to be hateful & hostile to someone who's asking for help either...[/quote]

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