Reply to My Kids' Father Is Slipping Out Of Their Lives

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It happened to us on both sides.  My ex-husband pretty much dropped out of the kids' lives when they were about 4 and 9.  He would pop back in every once in a while, but was never regular with visitations.  At one point he went almost three years without any contact.  Now that they are adults (20 and 25), he wants a relationship with them.  They are trying.

My DH's ex-wife checked out as a mom right after we got physical custody of the kids.  They were 5 and 8 at the time.  She saw them maybe twice a year - for a week during the summer and a day or two over Christmas.  That's it.  She rarely even acknowledged birthdays.  They are 19 and 21 now and have almost no relationship at all with her.  They aren't angry with her.  They see her at Christmas and call her on her Birthday.  But there is no real relationship there.  I am "mom" as far as they are concerned.

It's very sad.  But there really isn't much you can do to force visitation.  My only advise would be (1) NEVER -no matter how hard it is- badmouth the other parent.  And at the same time (2) Don't make excuses for the other parent.  I told the kids over and over again that we love people for who they are, not for who we want them to be.[/quote]

How'd you get custody?[/quote]

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