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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am really concerned why many people are in such a 'race' to get married so they can have/do something, instead of naturally feeling that this is the person who they want to spend the rest of their lives with?! We are no longer in the 14th Century (pre-Romeo and Juliet) when everything else other than [b]love[/b] required people to get married!

Do yourself, and your future kids (who WILL likely end up with emotional scars and lifelong insecurities) a favor and quit while it is safe to do so. Good luck to your husband who will end up with either a frustrating marriage, or child support drama, should you decide to proceed on this path..... :oops:

P.S. [b]Just to add: the institution of marriage as we practice it post-Henry VIII (or even post-1945) is not for everyone.[/b] I think for whatever reason, you are equating the need for marriage with the need to be a parent.....while a traditional approach, it is never automatic that it will make you, your partner, and your future children happy. Then again, what do I know....I read too much and have gone through too much.... :shock: [/quote]

OP here - It wasn't a race for me - I was approaching the point at which I would no longer be able to get pregnant. And I always felt that I wanted a family, as opposed to only a baby/a child. I do love my husband and he is a good man, a good partner in a lot of ways. We want the same things in life, even if we don't have a lot in common and we're not passionately in love. We're an odd match; it will never be one of those relationships that fulfills all my needs. I will always need friends and outside interests to feel whole - but I think that's healthy in any relationship. I think most of our problems stem from the fact that we are struggling financially and my husband is working too much, which generates the stress that causes him to have the occasional outburst. I do believe our financial situation, and his work situation, will improve. I'm also depressed at the moment in the wake of a pregnancy loss. So maybe that's why I'm feeling a bit down on my marriage. We have been through a lot of sadness since we got married and it has made us stronger as a couple. So there's something to be said for that. [/quote]

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