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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Someday you will be the mil and your DIL will be trashing you.  How sad.  Perhaps everyone should try a little more tolerance and understanding.  The works would be a better place.  All thei bitterness terrifies me for the future.  It seems as if mil can do nothing right. Patent are are involved or under involved.  Too clingy or aloof. Too opinionated or spineless. Sad, really. [/quote]
Let's talk when your child gets a mil like mine. I'd like too see you judging all is then. Sad, indeed.[/quote]

This is exactly the type of MIL we are addressing.  Bitter MILs are the worst.  Your DIL is not your scapegoat, and is only nice to you because she is the bigger person of the two of you.  MILs are supposed to be older and wiser and know better; not some bitter hag who needs a target.  The bitter hags can back off.  Once the grandkids get old enough, they will be saying the same thing to the bitter grandmother.  Is that how you want your grandchildren to remember you?  As a bitter hag?

I plan to make an effort with my DIL and grandchildren, to be warm and welcoming - not just saying I "support" them, but actually showing it.  And not just doing something once a year for bragging rights to my bridge club cronies.  That will be progress from the true colors my MIL showed me.

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