Reply to Desperately lonely with my excellent house-husband

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I feel for you.  My DH just so you don't feel so alone can be like this -- staying up late cleaning things and can be hard to talk to.  At dinner he zones out and a lot of the conversation we have is with our barely verbal toddler.

The thing is you have done all the right things.    You have tried communicating your feelings, therapy, etc.  I think the one thing you haven't done is communicate the importance of your feelings.  It is clear you can't live like this.  You don't want to.  So you need to tell your DH that some things need to change.  And you don't want an ultimatum, exactly, but to communicate that something must change because you are miserable and can't continue on as you've been.

Come armed to this conversation with suggestions that you would like to consider.  Not all are necessary.  Here are some suggestions:
1) weekly date night to reconnect
2) start a joint hobby
3) counseling to get a 3rd party to help you figure out how to mediate
4)  regular family  dinners w/no podcast rule

I am feeling for you OP.  I told my DH that he uses these chores to destress which helped a little but I think my DH was just stressed not trying for isolation.  He needs to talk to you about what he is feeling.  If he cannot, he needs to realize his marriage and partnership with you is on the line.  If he is happy with how things are, then he is very selfish, because he is happy seeing you unhappy.  That isn't fair.
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