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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]i dont know if I can stay with him. he does make me feel like I am crazy. He makes me question everything I do or say with his narcissistic looks and comments. Then he switches to generous, giving , helpful.
A good friend of mine is divorced from a cheating husband and lives in a tiny studio in someone's house. She is miserable and says if she had to do it over, she would have stayed married.
I know every divorce is different , but he is very savvy w computers and finance. I know next to nothing. 
I am terrified. Not of being alone, i actually think that would be nice, To not be a servant for an ungrateful man. To not be home waiting for him while he is out yet another night.
I just feel that I will be left destitute. Maybe i am wrong, but never in a million years did I think this would ever happen to us.
I know that I must appear weak, but this is not me! i feel like someone pulled the rug out from under me and I cant get my bearings.[/quote]

OP, first thing, don't ask for divorce and stop confronting him. You need to make your mind without his pressure, involvement, gaslighting etc.

it is very possible that your standard of living would drop significantly while his goes up. Maybe you need to bid your time until things get worse for him, he gets sick or something. You need revenge and divorce is not necessarily a revenge (it could be a gift, really).

But again, do not try to "work" on this with him. He is your enemy and you need to find the best way to punish him.[/quote]

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