Reply to Rekindled Romance w/ Workaholic BF

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Reply to "Rekindled Romance w/ Workaholic BF - What Would You Do?"

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[quote=Anonymous]What stands out for me is the fact he did not have a plan for either how he can spend time with you while working 24-7 or how the extra weekend work helps a combined future (like a downpayment to the house) or an end date for the weekend work(like 1 year).  At the stage you guys are at (just getting back together) it makes sense to me that the job decision is one he makes on his own.  However, you have enough history together that he should take into account how it impacts you and not take for granted that you are available what we few hours he can spare from working.  The other thing of note is how he reacted to you bringing this topic up.  Assuming you were calm, making it seem like you are a control freak for wanting to spend some quality time isn't cool.

I guess bottom line is take a hard look and ask yourself can I live with X behaviors for the next 20 years?  if the answer is no you need to state your point and let him know it is a deal breaker.  I'm sure there is a woman that doesn't mind not seeing her boyfriend and it won't make her feel that she isn't a priority.  That same women won't bring up the topic so she won't ever be accused of being controlling.  That woman isn't you.  I think of the line for My Best Friend's wedding "Creme Brûlée can never be Jell-O You could never be Jell-O". You each have to find the person that is compatible.  Either you are naturally compatible or you are each willing to bend enough to meet in the middle to bridge differences without feeling you changed too much from who you are in the process.[/quote]

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