Reply to Please help me stop letting my mom get to me

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[quote=Anonymous]PP who is asking "Why", just stop doing that to yourself. The only reason Why is because she can't do better, or do differently. You want to know Why because then you can fix the "why", but you already know you can't fix it. You just have to settle for "Because she is".

OP- I know you can't be my sister because she doesn't have kids (and she's the favored one), but we have very similar moms. I agree with sending short texts and photos where possible to put off talking with her.  When you do talk to her, keep it superficial. But feel free to go on and on with the superficial (Tell her ALL ABOUT the playground equipment at the new park, or the novel you're reading, or your adventures in finding packing tape at the new to you store). My mom pretends we're so close because I'll "share" things with her, but only things that I don't care about.

Also, OP, to the extent you can, if you're going to talk to her, try your best not to care about her opinion.  No matter what you do with your son, she's going to make comments implying you're a bad mom. But you know that's a load of bull, and that she's a crappy mom but you're too polite to say it.  So just respond with whatever words will move you on, but don't take it to heart. To the extent you can stop wanting her approval, and find approval from someone who is nice and you can actually trust, it'll be much easier to deal with her. [/quote]

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