Reply to Advice needed: DS's girlfriend is a bad influence

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]He is an adult, responsible for his choices, which come with consequences[/b]. Tell him where you and your family stand and that you know that he is an adult and has to make his own decisions. Then let it go. You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink, so to speak. Some people learn the hard way but it's usually the only way they learn so as to not make the same mistakes again.[/quote]

Ha ha ha ha ha, that's a good one.

Is this "adult" paying for his own college tuition? Does he feed, clothe and house himself? He pays for his own health insurance too, right?[/quote]

While financial independence might be an important factor, I don't think it is wise to claim that the money is the key determinant of adulthood. By this logic, a stay-at-home parent who looks after the home and the family's children but does not have an income would not be considered an adult or have his/her choices respected.

OP, I understand your concerns, but I would try any number of other potential solutions before pulling the money card on your kid because (1) it could really backfire, and (2) it runs the risk of creating what I would consider an unhealthy attitude towards the relationship between money and power.[/quote]

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