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[quote=Anonymous]I'm just going to say that I think your husband is an asshole.  Anyone who goes around fat-hating coworkers and random people is an asshole, period.  I am sorry you are married to an asshole.

It must feel really toxic to be in a relationship with such a hateful asshole, who directs his hate at fat people, and then feel fat yourself, knowing that on some level your jerk husband must be disgusted with you.

But that is not on YOU.  You sound like a lovely, decent person.  You are working hard and taking care of three children.  You are exhausted.  Sometimes you snack to cope with stress or boredom.  (I suspect you may snack at night because it feels lonely to be in a marriage with a guy who is kind of a jerk.  I'm sorry.  Loneliness sucks.)

I wish you could love yourself more and see what a wonderful person you are.  If you can make time in your day to start doing some yoga, you may feel increased connection to your body, and that increased connection might feed your love of yourself, which may inspire you to move more and nourish yourself with good food and good friends and lots of laughter.

Maybe your body shape will change, and maybe it won't.  But you are beautiful RIGHT NOW, and you are worthy of love right now.  You do not need to punish yourself.  You do need to embrace and be kind to yourself.  You may find that you feel better if you exercise; if that's true, I hope you do.

If your body shape does change, and your husband finds you more attractive, I hope you will keep in mind that his hatred of fat people is still a problem.  He will teach your children to hate fat people.  What if one of them goes through a chubby phase, as is normal for some adolescents before a growth spurt?  If she has heard her dad spouting fat hate her whole life, this could permanently damage her and her relationship with her body.  Please do not dismiss his toxicity as your failing.  He is the unhealthy one, not you.

Good luck.  [/quote]

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