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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No, you are not being unreasonable.

It doesn't matter if they want to be helpful, it's rude to just text, not get a response, and show up anyhow.

Given you didn't respond to their text, they should have called.

They were rude.  If I were you, I would tell them that you appreciate that they want to see the baby, but they really need to check with you before stopping by.  It's not unreasonable.  A text saying "we're coming over" isn't enough.  They need to check with you, as in 'hey, is it okay if we stop by?"

I would be LIVID if anyone just let themselves into my house.  My parents have keys to my house, but they understand that they still have to knock, that they are only to use the key in case of an emergency.  I have a key to their house, too, and the same thing goes.  I would never just let myself in without making sure it was okay with them beforehand.

Don't let other PPs make you feel bad for setting boundaries.  It's your house and your life.  If you don't want people to just come and go as they please from your house, it's your right to set that boundary.

[/quote]

This pretty much sums it up. I hope, very much hope, that your ILs realized what a faux pas they made and are embarrassed, and that is why they are going through DH.

DH needs to smooth this over: "Mom, Dad, we love you, but really? Just barging in when you know she is home with the baby? Stopping by without having received a reply? C'mon, she is doing the best she can. You need to be sure that DW has said it is a good time to stop by before you do.  She is be always checking her phone, so if you don't hear back by the next day, by all means, try me.  DW is glad to see you and happy to have your help, but you can't just show up like that and surprise her."[/quote]

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