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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you were right to not invite your mom (or accept your mother's self invitation) to visit with your father's relatives, but I wouldn't have given all the detail you did when explaining why. The main reason is that her ex-ILs have invited you and it wouldn't be your place to set up a reunion between your mother & her ex-ILs. All the issues you describe re the accommodations she requires wouldn't be a problem is she was visiting her own family or friends. It's the fact that she wants to visit her ex-family/ILs that's weird - regardless of her special needs. [/quote]

Not everyone is on bad terms with ex-ils.[/quote]

It's not about being on bad or good terms with ex-ILs, but if some one invites their adult niece or grandchild to come visit, it would be odd for the ex-DIL/SIL to just assume she should come to. There are friendly and less friendly divorces in my family and separate socialization is the norm either way. If there's a wedding or some big family function at a 3rd venue, sure everyone shows up and is nice, but after a divorce, people usually stop just showing up uninvited to their ex-IL's place. [/quote]

OP here.  My parents had a very long, ugly divorce which was paired with an even uglier 10 year long custody battle.
My mother doesn't keep contact with my father's family, aside from my aunt being her dental hygienist.
Another thing I didn't mention is that my other aunt is suffering from terminal breast/liver/lung cancer.
This will likely be the last time I see her.  
She used to be very close with these people but hasn't spoken to many of them in years.
[/quote]

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