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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why do you lie about or hide it? Why don't you just tell you significant other that you met someone else and want a relationship with them [b]before you crush someone forever[/b]? Even if your significant other will never find out, why not just be honest and end the relationship with your SO before cheating?  I am asking sincerely and honestly want to know what your reason of thinking or lack thereof may be. Thank you. [/quote]

You are making one big leap.  Divorce - or breaking up- is crushing anyways.  In my view, you are saying that the options are break up b/c of affair or stay married.  It is a false choice.  If my DH said to me "I am having a affair, I want out," it would impact me that same as if he said "I am not seeing anyone but this is not working for me-I want out."  It is the 'I want out" that would throw me - it does not matter why.  How would you feel if DH said "I am not seeing anyone but we are sexually incombatible.  I want out so that I can get my needs met without guilt."  Would that make you feel better?

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