Reply to if you wanted 2 kids and only had 1 because spouse only wanted 1, how did it turn out?

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Reply to "if you wanted 2 kids and only had 1 because spouse only wanted 1, how did it turn out?"

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[quote=Anonymous]We have one.  We talked about having a second, but decided against it for several reasons.  There are some real advantages to having only one, and plenty of ways to mitigate the stereotypical concerns about onlies.  Worried your kid will be spoiled and selfish?  Don't spoil them.  Worried your kid will be lonely?  Provide opportunities for them to socialize and participate in group activities, and facilitate their friendships and relationships with extended family.  Worried about your old age?  Work to save for retirement, prepare healthcare directives, living wills, etc.

Resenting your wife is pointless.  No one should have a kid they don't want--it's not fair to that person or to the kid.  Sometimes we don't get what we want in life--even things that are really important to us.  But you can focus on what you don't have, or you can focus on what you do have--a child and a family you love.  So work on making the best of that.

A good read is "One and Only," by Lauren something, who covers the actual research about only children and tries to look objectively at the advantages and disadvantages of single children.  "Nurtureshock" also has a good chapter about learning to share, siblings, and friends.  [/quote]

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