Reply to "Because I'm Your Mother and I Said So!"

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Reply to ""Because I'm Your Mother and I Said So!""

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What if your kid questions another adult about something they should be respectful about though?

Adult:  Jennifer, show June where to hang up her coat and put her shoes.
June:  At my house we just hang out coats over the railing so that's where I put mine.
Adult:  June, at our house coats go in the closet.  Please take your coat and follow Jennifer.  She will show you where to hang it up.
June:  Why?  It's just fine where it is.
Adult:  June, I did not ask your opinion about whether your coat goes in the closet or not.  Our house rules are that coats go in the closet.  Please go with Jennifer and hang up your coat.
June:  I still don't understand why I have to.  My coat is not bothering anyone and when I leave I have to go get it back out again.

If I am the Adult and June is my kid's friend, guess who won't be invited back.  My kid is older than 6 and I have seen a lot of Junes.  I totally understand allowing your kid to push boundaries at home, but requiring children to follow rules and respect authority does not equal "blind obedience."

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I have never seen a kid argue with an adult (other than their parent or someone they are really close to) in this manner.  I guess it can happen. But that's also a manners issue more than a respect issue, IMO. And the adult isn't being too polite in this scenario, either. Would you you that tone of voice/choice of words when discussing this with an adult guest?

I can see it more if the kid is jumping on the furniture, or throwing toys around in a way that would injure others or break the toys. [/quote]

I have.  Friends were so worried about their two kids blindly following directions of an adult that they told the kids the only adults they needed to obey were their parents.  And off the kids go to visit the grandparents, to pre-school, art classes etc. and the kids are telling the adults, I don't have to do what you tell me because I don't have to listen to you.

Bottom line for me is that young kids should not be left unattended with adults who are not trusted completely, so you don't have to worry about the kids getting into trouble if they follow the directions of the adults around them.  As children get older, you give them more leeway to question what they are told.  I also would not allow my 4 year old son to "trust his instincts" since his instinct tell him that sleeping in the dark could result in his death.[/quote]

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