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[quote=Anonymous]Divorce Poison is a helpful book.  I have stuck out marriage for nearly 30 years in order to raise my children and maintain some control.  Its been rough, and as the years have rolled on gotten harder.  One thing that helped was creating healthy bonding experiences between my husband and children.  Yes, it was manipulative and expensive.  I seldom went on trips and there are virtually no family photos.  One of my kids is now a doctor and one a professional musician and one is still stretching towards adulthood.  Have good people in their lives who will still be there in young adulthood.  Try to have funny things available like good humored jokes, posters, movies, music.  It takes alot to cancel out the bad conduct.  I read these submissions and almost want to cry.  Recently my husband has filed for divorce and now I also am facing the struggle of my life but at least my kids have made it through.  Its hard and it hurts and I am  no longer young.  Finding a new byway isn't easy but here is another thing that helped me personally---new words!  Get a dictionary and look for words that are succinct, positive and get you to think along new mental pathways.  I list phrases, words  and figurative meanings etc.  I am a professional.  My life gears towards problem solving and tense situations, and hospice care.  Its been heartbreaking to look back on a wasteland so take care of yourself and nurture yourself and cry when you have to.  Smile when you can.  I love my husband and I am sorry his life is so meaningless.[/quote]

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