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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]have you looked at yourself. you seem pretty damn assertive.  perhaps you've damaged his self esteem.  and no, I'm not trying to be a bitch.  many times women with your traits look for men that they can tower over and control a little bit.  then during marriage they let the woman lead and take over a bit.   but now you are regretting it.  try encouraging him and get over yourself a little bit.  [/quote]

I am not a ball buster and I am do not try to "control" him.  As if I could.  I do encourage him.  I've done everything but put on a fucking cheerleading outfit and wave my pom poms.  Same conversation over and over about all of his positive traits, accomplishments, etc etc and. . . .it's the same shit, different day.

I don't want a divorce.  I have no illusions that any other man would be better.  I just want to want sex with my husband instead of going through the motions like a chore.  It's uninspiring and I don't feel the confidence there either.[/quote]

OP, your first post made you sound like a huge bitch. Your follow up posts make you sound like a good support person who is tired of being SOLELY a support person. Does your husband provide emotional support to you?

I spent 7 years married to a man who I provided constant support to. I listened to all of his career woes, planned things with him, delighted in his successes and was generally by his side every step of the way. It was a one way street. My career, dreams, and needs were secondary. The things "we" planned were all his things. If I expressed a wish, it was greeted with skepticism.

Granted, your husband has different issues than my ex, but I totally sympathize with the exhaustion that comes from being the perpetual cheerleader and not having your needs met.[/quote]

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