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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Really appreciate the views shared. I am trying to come to accept my wife as being a permanent SAH, though it's not our original agreement. House we bought was on the promise from her that she'd return to work. If this doesn't happen, our expenses are too high for my income. So I was thinking to tell her that if things don't change in 18 months we would sell the house, and adjust our lifestyle accordingly. I realize this sounds like an ultimatum which I would avoid but that's the gist. I admit it is 95% a money issue and 5% a principle issue.[/quote]

My husband encouraged me to SAH and I could not imagine it.  I am now and this was absolutely not what we agreed to but he was right, I am much happier at home and when I am happier, he is happier.  Get over your principal as if she does not earn enough to pay child care or a nanny, you could end up supplementing child care and that doesn't include work clothing, gas, car expenses, etc.  If you cannot afford your current lifestyle, it is reasonable to have that discussion.  You tell her you are fine with her staying at home/not working but the current financial situation is not working and you need to downsize the house and adjust your lifestyle, especially with the addition of another child.  [/quote]

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