Reply to Husband plans going to a strip club but telling me he isn't

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Husband plans going to a strip club but telling me he isn't"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote]The problem in this situation is your DH is the guy in charge of the party.

Ok the lying, I think you can separate this out here and work on it. I think it's the easier of the two things to deal with (I see how this thing could have morphed into a situation where he started lying, so I don't think it's the end of the world, but you guys have to reestablish that honesty trumps his fear of you getting mad at him).
But his paramount loyalty should be with you, not his friend, and that's why I can see OP getting upset.

I'd have a calm discussion with him and possibly, put up front that you're tabling the "what to do about this party" discussion until after this discussion about reestablishing your lines of honest communication, trust, and loyalty.

Now what to do with the party. It's in July…he can hand it over to someone else to plan. You will need to give him permission to throw you under the bus. He can laugh and just say he's got a ball-n-chain and she's highly pregnant and hormonal and that's just the way it's gotta be. Or he can bow out later due to your pregnancy and put someone else in charge. Or he goes but excuses himself. There might be some other solution; see what HE can come up with.[/quote]

OP here, I totally agree with you on why this turned into a situation that he "had" to start lying about.  He TOTALLY has my permission to use me as an excuse not to go!  I really wish he could just sit that part out.  But it looks like he is not going to and thus is hiding it from me,  it really hurts.  I don't want him to not plan the weekend or not go at all, I don't want to be like that. I think he will just end up resenting me.  My sister told me to tell him again how I don't like it but that I realize he will be under pressure to go and I'd rather him not lie about it and trust that he will not cross any lines and loves me.  Unfortunately, I am worried about something else happening just because they will all be drunk, and the peer pressure, etc.  but I think that she's right in that it will make it harder for him to cross any lines if I tell him I trust him.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics