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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]do I keep them?  Return them?  Donate them?  Send a thank you?  Ignore them?

We've been on bad terms with my in-laws for many years because they have no idea how to respect boundaries[b] (see above).[/b]  We recently moved, but I guess FIL got our address from a non-estranged family member.  Which, whatever.  But sending gifts to my kids when you're not even in a position to call them?  That feels really invasive and rude, in the same way that a lot of FIL's behavior has been disrespectful of the boundaries Husband and I have set (clearly, in writing, repeatedly).

I was raised to send a thank you card when I receive a gift, and I feel a bit obligated, but part of me wants to ignore the jerk as this seems really manipulative.

Advice?[/quote]

OP--What are you referring to when you write "see above?"  :?:  :?:  :?: [/quote]

that the inlaws sent gifts to the kids despite being estranged.[/quote]

New poster -- but what does that mean?

Sending them gifts could be a loving gesture -- Mommy and Daddy and I are having a fight about the beach house, but I know you wanted the Barbies so here they are.  Or it could be the malicious sinister divisive boundary-fucking prerogative that OP thinks it is.  We just don't know.  We don't know what the estrangement is, how long and lasting it is, what the grandparents did, what the parents did.  All we have are the projections of the responders.  [/quote]

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