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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, it is a lot to think about. You might try goggling some info. It will tell you that stat wise, your chances are dismal. {{{sorry!}}} IVF is hard on your body in general, and quite stressful. 3 cycles -- that will take at least a year, then you will be 43. and starting DE. DE is a lot to think about, but if your goal is a baby in a reasonable time frame, and you are OK with DE, perhaps better to go for what is likely to work for you. There will always be someone who "succeeded" with their own eggs, but the stats are way against you. Your doc is giving you good advice.[/quote]
signed VERY VERY happy DE mom.[/quote]

OP, I was you - same age, similar numbers, etc...   I spent a little more than a year and a half doing all the initial testing and and an IVF cycle w/ my own eggs.  (Even getting to the actual cycle takes mock cycles, timing challenges, etc... - it all takes waaaaay longer than you think it's going to.)  But I felt that I wanted to at least give it a shot and see if I would be one of the statistical miracles.  (I was w/ Dr. Abassi at Columbia Fertility - she gave my chances of a successful healthy birth at less than 5% with my age and numbers.)   We gave it a shot and my response to the treatment was nil - not one fully formed egg.  There were options for other protocols to try but my husband and I both felt that if our most important goal was a healthy child, then that goal was best achieved with donor eggs.  We also wanted to have the option of having two children - which almost certainly wouldn't happen w/ my own eggs but had much better odds of being an option if we used a donor.  As my husband said at the time, total failure was the next best thing to total success.  It was sort of a blessing that I was so totally unresponsive.

We moved to donor eggs and on our second cycle (w/ frozen blasts) we got pregnant w/ twins.  Today we have thriving two year old b/g twins and I had a fairly easy, healthy pregnancy that I carried to term.

I think if I were in your shoes again I probably would do what you're considering (especially if you have insurance coverage!) - trying a cycle just to see how I respond and then moving on to DE.   But if you feel emotionally/intellectually ready to just go forward with DE I think that is a terrific decision also.  Especially if you can foresee more than one child - then getting started asap rather than investing a significant chunk of time in a statistically unlikely pursuit could be very smart.

You sound like you're in a great place with it all already though.  I can tell you that while I certainly wish that I had been able to do all of this a decade ago, or have miraculously fabulous eggs in my 40's, once I got pregnant I felt very confident that the babies would be healthy.  I'm not sure I would have had that much peace of mind when pregnant, or even now that they're born, if they were the product of my old eggs.   Beyond just the hurdles of the odds of a healthy pregnancy/baby, the risk of other complications w/ babies from older eggs isn't insignificant.  So that's another benefit of a young donor.  (And pick a proven donor by the way, if you go that route.)

Whatever you decide - good luck!  I hope a year from now your holiday season will have taken on an entirely new layer of joy![/quote]

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