Reply to getting divorced and DH and I disagree on child custody

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I have an ex who is not really able to manage the daily responsibilities/administration of kids, so I know where you're coming from. First, if I were you, I would insist on "right of first refusal" in the custody agreement. This means that whatever you agree on in terms of "custody share", if your ex is not able to personally be with the kids during "his" time, he must ask you first if you would like to spend that time with them, before he looks for a sitter or family member and vice-versa. [/b]
My ex asked for this and I said no.  The court mediator and my attorney backed me up and my ex's attorney said to give it up.  If there is opposition to this, courts aren't likely to grant it.  
 [/quote]
What was the reason you said no?  I can see how right of first refusal would be hard to implement in certain situations (high conflict parental relationship, significant distance between homes, etc.)  
[/quote]

Honestly, it wasn't about conflict or distance.  I just couldn't imagine having my ex so much in my business.  Also, when you get a babysitter, the kids are in your home and when you use your ex you have to send them to your ex's home.  It's not that I don't use my ex instead of a babysitter.  I just don't want to be court ordered to do so.  [/quote]

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