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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It sort of came up in the context of how much time I was spending with the kids.  "So, X, what happens when you come home?"  Me:  "Well, I may wash my face, and then I walk the dog."  "Could you walk the dog an hour or so later so that your kids could have more time with you?"  Me:  "Yes, I guess I could.  Though that's a long time for him to wait."  "I think that would be a good idea."

Therapist "What time do you get home from work?"  "Around 7:30."  "Is there any way you could get home a bit earlier?"

etc.[/quote]

I'm the PP at 13:59.

I have been in plenty of therapy - couples and solo.  It has always - with several different therapists (not all were good fits - you have to find one who is a good fit) - taken the form of asking me a maddening number of questions about myself, or about "us" and about what is bothering me/us, and [b]generally offering very little in the way of prescriptive solutions.[/b]  To the point of annoyance and frustration: what are we seeing and paying you for anyway?  Only once, in a horrible and toxic relationship, did the therapist tell us to do anything, and that was "go be apart for the time being" - separate houses.    That didn't preclude my therapists from giving me "homework" but it nearly always took the form of getting me to arrive at my own answers.

I mean: if you all are a few months in and she's got all the background, etc., then fine maybe it's to the suggestion/solution phase.  Still...this seems more like she's telling you all how to reorder the whole family (and you gut is telling you this is what is going on too) - and the whole family is not the client, you and your husband as individuals and your relationship are - rather than listening to you.

Of course, really hard to know with such limited information.  Not to be antagonistic or obnoxious, but: are you sure it's not just that you and your husband don't particularly [i]like[/i] what she is telling you to do and are looking for a reason to reject it/her?  The best therapy I ever had (in large part because I was finally old enough/ready to hear/do it) involved doing a TON of stuff I just hated, felt was pointless and useless.  It was even more annoying that I came around to see that I was completely wrong and happy with the outcome.

Good Luck![/quote]

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