Reply to Saying no to two Christmases

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This seems to be a dilemna for a lot of folks, and I don't understand it. I avoid all this by just saying that now that we have children, we want to spend our Christmas at home with them. And that anyone in the family who wants to join us would be more than welcome. If they don't want to come, that's their choice and there's no hard feelings. And if they do, it's great.[/quote]

We did this too and it's working out fine after some initial grumbling. It's much easier for two retired people to come visit than a family with two working parents take vacation time, etc. OP, do you WANT to spend all the minor and major holidays and birthdays with the husband's family, or do you want to start doing some of them at your house, with your nuclear family? If what you're doing is working for you, fine, but I personally wouldn't want to schlep my family four hours each way for every special occasion. They are asking way too much of you simply because they don't want to travel. I hope you'll put your foot down if you don't want to do all the traveling anymore. They will bitch and moan about it, but I bet once they realize you're serious, they'll end up coming to visit you after all.

For this Christmas, at least, I'd say "we're going to spend Christmas with wife's family this year. We'll be back on xx date and would love to see you if you'd like to come visit and celebrate then!" If they try to insist that you come to them, just say "sorry, that's not going to work for us this year. We'd love to see you if you can make it!" And repeat. Good luck to you.[/quote]

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